So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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