We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
