why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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