I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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