I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize