I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
