i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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