somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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