there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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