Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
