you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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