wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
