There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
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