About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
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