Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize