Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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