Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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