Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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