im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
