She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
