You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
