I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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