I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize