i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize