Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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