That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Watching her eat just hurts me
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
sex in a hospital.. check
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
