Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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