i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize