Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize
