let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
