Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
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