It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
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