You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I feel like abortions should bother me more
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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