My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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