Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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