let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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