For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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