Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
