well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"