youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
