And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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