Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
What a dumb baby whore.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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