Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I think my moral compass just broke
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize