Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
