the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
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Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
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I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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