I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
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