he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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