I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
