Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
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