I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
