Fuck appropriateness.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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