Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
